Sahabat...

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Kau amat bermakna dalam hidupku....

 

specially credit to Jai, Pokmok, aini, nisa, solah, haziq, pok pik, moja....(n_n)

Thursday, October 28, 2010

????

y sebenarnyer................aku pown xtau nk update pew dlm blog nie...nothings special nk share kat sni....ntah,,chow ar...huhuhuhu


aku stuju sgt2...(n_n)

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

ape y aku wat nie?????

firstly,,hati nie mmg terbakar...ckup2 hangit dah...mcm2 la mslh aku skrg nie,,org y aku percaye pown xleh nk pakai...stop shitting at me k...all of u r bullshit.juz showing ur kindness on ur face,,but deep inside,,arghhhh!!!!...some kind of an evil placed inside....!!!!!..aku da borink ngn sume wayang2 nie...sume juz nk tunjuk baik jew dpn aku...aku da borink da bg muke kat sape2.....now i am who i am...others,,plz step away from my life....suck ur own veins,,idiot!!!......

aku mmg ckup2 xpuas ati arinie coz mcm2 y berlaku...include sumone who teach me...can't mention his name,,alwayz find my mistake...when i want 2 share my probs,,he pretend that im not follow the procedure...procedure wak lu!!!!...hidup nie penuh ngn budi bicare,,bkn jd hambe pd peraturan y manusia sindiri wat..peraturan Tuhan wat xreti plk nk follow....argghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate stay in this hell...like a prison!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Hari2 terakhir....

hampir bape hari da aku xupdate blog nie....bkn sbb bz,,tp bnyk beban dlm kepale nie nk pikir....ari tue mslh dlm family aku,,but sume da kembali normal....skrg plk,,dtg lg masalah baru.mmg msalah nie sush nk settle sket...aku masih dlm percaye n xpercaye....xtau nk ckp pew..tp inilah realiti.....

bile cerita psl kes di alam lain nie,,mmg sush aku nk percaye,,susah aku nk absorb...but da truely is,,my mum mayb,,repeat mayb disantau...coz da wierd things many times happen at home....masuk kali nie pown da 3kali mama aku meracau mlm2....aku xtau nk crite ape da....klu ikot kepale otak aku,,mmg aku xpercaye 100% psl bende2 tahyul nie....tp now its really happen.aku pown xbalik umah lg nie coz my mum said don't....mama aku xbagi balik...xtawu la...aku nk tggu dlu n lihat dlu camne...klu agak2 da berat sgt 2 tepakse la aku ikhtiar jgk....aku sbnarnye sush percaye psl bende2 cm2...

aku da serabut da,,sampai kelas rini pown aku xg...lecturer aku da mrh2 da,abes sume bdk kls aku kene mrh ngn dier sbb aku..sorry frenz,,krane aku korg kene mrh...xtawu da nk ckp pew lagi.my frenz juz told me ptg td y my lecturer nk bwk citer aku nie smpai ke head of department.he's know nothing bout me,,xkan aku nk citer sume bende kat org.xkan aku nk jaje pekung aku sendiri.xreti da aku nk wat camne lagi...aku agak dier mrh coz direct 3minggu nie aku xmasuk kls dier...coz aritue aku duk bz settlekan psl msalah fam aku..aku cuti lebih sehari ahad tue,duk kat umah...ahad mggu lps aku duk settlekan psl inovasi...n arini mmg aku xde mood nk masuk kls...pdahal aku da siap2 awal lagi..tp mood xde,,kepale aku duk serabut pk psl bende nie....nk wat camne da.....teruk la aku sem nie...ape nk jadi nie....bala dtg bertimpe2....aku da xkuat nk tempuh da...rase mcm2,,rase xnk idup da....serabut sgt..rase nk lari dari sume nie...srabut!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, October 15, 2010

I want to spend my lifetime loving you....(n_n)

AKU & AKU lagi.....

erm...ptg nie aku duk sowg2 dlm bilik..my rumate???die g campaign lor...huhuhu.aku xtawu nk tulis pew sebenarnye..juz nk share jew,,aku secare pakse rela kene jadi hakim debat interunit pd kali nie...y sebelom2 nie mmg aku slalu cabut coz seperti biase ujung minggu mmg aku akn balik umah..tp minggu nie aku ingat nk rest lebih sket kat hostel..coz aku da xbrape lame da lagi nk kuar dr sni...tinggal +23hari lagi klu xsilap....maka,berakhir la story aku kat maktab nie sepanjang lbh 5tahun setengah begelumang ngn manusia y hipokrit kebanyakannyer dlm mktab nie...kdg2 rase muak pown ade...tp y penting,,kat sni bnyk mengajar aku erti sebenar kawan,sahabat,kekasih,musuh dan seangkatan dgn nyer....

tp y penting,,aku da nk kuar da...aku nk lupakan sume kenangan2 pahit aku kat sni....n for all the one i hav failed 2 their heart wit my bad attitude,,i feel sorry 4 it...mungkin aku xcukup baik utk mereka2 2 kot...coz aku da cube y terbaik..tp xcukup baik utk buat mereka hargai aku...so now,,may all of u will get sumone better than me...one of them da slamat diijabkabul pown...feel happy for her 2..huhuhu..let bygone be bygone...


for da last person who hv make my heart beat,,i know u r not guilty...u r not mean 2 do it..but da situation that crushed both of us....mayb we r not suppose 2 be frenz be 4....coz my bad is,,im really easy 2 get love wit sumone who care 4 me....thats da true statement....so,,my confession is....SORRY 2 GET U IN TROUBLE WIT ME,,,,,(n_n)....

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Segalenye da kembali normal.....

da brape hari aku xupdate blog aku nie...mcm2 peristiwa da blaku spanjang 4,5 ari nie...nnt aku upload gmbr klu sempat,,coz aku bz sgt3 ngn inovai n viva thesis....n skrg,,idup aku da kembali normal...hanye ade aku & diri aku...xperlu lg aku main tarik2 tali @ bekecil ati...sume masalah aku yang banyak gggu idup aku selame bout this 3 weeks da terjawab....my parent??..Alhamdulillah,,back 2 normal 2...ade la gaduh sket2.abah majuk,,mama pujuk..mama majuk,,abah wat derk jew...hehehehe...2 mmg normal la tue...bile ank bongsu vs ank sulong...conclusinyer,,klu anak bongsu better kawen ngan ank sulong..baru lew ade nk layan kiter..hahahaha.one side of my life da kembali normal da...


n da other side of my life...yes,,im still lonely...mayb tuhan nk ajar aku utk kenal erti sebuah hubungn....jgn ambil mudah...xpe,,aku da redha dengn ape y berlaku..n im ready 2be single 4 da rest of my life if da mmg my destiny idup ku 2be aloner...smiles is da key,zaiful...nothing 2be regret & upset.....huhuhuhu.walaupun aku xde sape2 dlm ati nie..tp aku bersyukur sbb aku masih ade my parent,siblings yg support aku...aku ade kwn2 y same2 ade mse aku sush n senang...pepatah org tua penah ckp,,klu kiter nk bekawn lame,jgn jadikn kawan kite 2 teman sebantal,kelak nnt hilang makne persahabatan 2.....so now,,aku xbersedia utk ade sape2 dlm ati...mcm2 keperitan da aku rse..so,,da giv up n xnak da...aku xrisau pown klu xde teman  idup...coz my second brother pown xkawen lg,,umo da msuk 35 da....nothing wierd pown..kakak kembar aq pown xkawen lg...so,,xkan aku nk gatal2 potong Que diowng kot..hahahaha
erm..ckup da kot aku merapu mlm nie..nk tdo...nitez..hahahaha

Monday, October 11, 2010

My way!!!!!!

now its my own way 2 get along wit my path....i need sumone no more.....my confession is all gurlz,,i repeat again yer..all gurlz are suck!!!!!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

im back now all ready,,setelah beberape hari aku g kL utk slesaikn masalah y bertimbun..& at last all thing is back 2 normal...Alhamdulillah!!!!...hik3.like it so much.....

eventhough i have through all da bad things in da hard way...its have teach me a lots along wit that way....it teach me how 2 appreciate sumone with all its take.....be4 it left u alone....so much things i wanna share here..but let secret be inside me....we all juz claimed that we know him,,but hv see da surface only of  true story..deep inside,,only da man who knows how much its burn him insidely......hope so,,this is da last terrible things happen 2 him...he not so strong 2 face it anymore....coz da man's heart is crack is much as the rolling stone smash 2 da ground.....

i alwayz believe our prophet said,,gud gurlz is for da gud boy,,& vice versa...so,,its not a gud boy...im really sure & damned2 sure that my partner will be da bad once....huhuhu..Alhamdulillah..its all by da God sake....aku trime dgn ati terbuka....xde ape y nk disesalkan....

da most from most2 important is im alwayz love my mama & abah...hope so my beloved abah & mama alwayz in God bless....i love both of u very much....only both of u that i have.....iwe xdok sapo2 doh lagi....ado mama & abah jah hok saye ko iwe......(n_n)....

Thursday, October 7, 2010

aku punyer Suke.....

Terima kasih diucapkan pade chemah & sekeluarga utk jamuan raya pade smlm...so enjoyable!!!!
sampai nk pecah perut mkn lew...hehehehe
below serba sedikit suasane & kekecohan y terjadi mase kat umah chemah..hahaha

P&P masih dalam keadaan terkawal...

Dah start mule wat kacau bilau kat umah chemah...hahahahaha 

Poje tengah tahan nafas..


Aku dengan Zul Kapan.. 

 Amin cacing tengah sengal..hahahaha
HAntu cermin lew..huhuhu 

Bersama dengan Ayah Chemah(kopiah putih) & jiran2 dier

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

wah...aku sakit hati....

hari nie..aku cukup SAKIT ATI..rase nk lempang owg pown ade...sume owg take forgranted jew ngn keje y patot diowg buat..pewning aku...so,,as da option,aku wat xtau jerk...mls jgk aku nk wat caring2 nie..pewnat dah sgt ngn perangai manusia....

but,,y penting arini aku ckup2 enjoy ngn kwn2 aku dlm kelas..tdr pg sampai la ke mlm schedule idup aku penuh ngn jamuan raye..huhuhuhu..pg td jamuan jabatan,,ptg td jamuan umah Che mah my classmate,,mlm nie pulak jamuan kat cafe abeman...murahnyer rezeki arini...Alhamdulillah...

tp,conclusion nyer aku cukup suke bile classmate aku da kembali berbaik semula...suke sgt2...
huhhuhu..itu la ape y ku tunggu slame nie...suke sgt2...1st Batch Banchelor Maths Edu..!!!

Hidup kah aku????

dah xsampai sebulan setengah da lg aq berada kat dunia besut nie....memang telampau bnyk kenangan pahit aq kat sni...tp pengalaman bnyk mengajar aq erti kehidupan,,erti bekawan,,erti sebuah persahabatan,,erti sebuah hubungan....
kat sni aq ckup belajar utk kenal & faham sikap setiap manusia..siapa itu manusia..ape y manusia bleh buat..dll
aku sayang sume y ade kat sni,,tp makin aq sayang,,semakin menebal kebencian aq pd mereka2 y selame besame aku...mane tidaknyer,,hanye tingga xberape lame lagi aku akn berpisah dgn diowg...its alwayz killing me!!!
aku tahu,,setiap petemuan akn menjanjikan perpisahan,,y membezakannya hanya hidup @ mati....itu dah janji tuhan pd kite...tp aq smpai skrg masih bingung....ditambah lg dengan msalah aku di rumah y nmpak mcm xde penghujungnye....AKU SAYANG MAMA & ABAH!!!!!!
tapi klu dah takdir,,mmg aq terime jew....itu dah kehendak Allah....tp aku akn doakan y terbaik utk mereka selalu...itu janji ANAKMU....

soal hati,,skrg xde komen.jiwe aq da kosong da...i need 2 rest now...xperlu lg utk mencari...give up is da key...aq da muak dengan cintan cintun...malas nk pk ape2...juz me & myself now....aq lg slesa...
mmg xdinafi idup sendirian cukup sunyi,,tp xpe,,aku tetap ade kwn2 aku....tempat leh ngadu,,aku ade moja,,aini,,nisa,,tq guys....
walaupun aku sendirian,,mereka bnyk luang mase utk aku..teman aq ke mane2,,ambil berat psl aku...aku xmintak lebih dr Allah,,cukup sekadar mereka ade disamping aku...itu pun da ckup menenangkan aku y masih dlm kebingungan....aku cube sehabis mungkin utk simpan bende nie dlm ati aku....wlaupun ia membunuhku dalm senyap...
kadang2 my tears drop without any reason...i don't know what should i do 2 stop it...aq da bosan da nangis...tp itu la aku,,tawa didepan ramai,,tp nangis dalam diam....tq nisa coz ko jd teman aku mase nangis,,,,malu tetap malu,,tp air mate nie xleh nk sekat da...xmampu nk tahan....

from now on,,i will be da though guy,,no more tears...useless is da key 4 da man who alwayz get tears in his life...as my grandpa had told me b4...so now on,,da tough zaiful is coming back...da person with no soul,egosentric,with a big2 pride...no more da sensitive boy,,caring person,,friendly guy like b4..da world,,here i come again!!!!!!!...boo wit da bad attitude.....

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

PEWNAT!!!!!!

arini aq xg kelas pown....semangat nk blaja langsung xde...
ntah la..kadang2 rase my life is facing 2 da end....
mcm da penamat da dlm idup aq....
but i need 2 raise up again...i need 2 be tough...i need 2 be strong..
but...there r exactly no body beside me....what a sad story of me...
now,,here i am..standing forward 2 stand again....
anybody,,plz..plz help me...
i need sumone now......

Monday, October 4, 2010

Jiwa Aku Kosong.....

Jiwa....ya,jiwa aq kosong pade detik & saat ini...segale ape yang aq harapkan seakan-akan mahu musnah..
kadang kala,ingin jgk aq persoalkan,,"Kenape aq,bukan org lain!!??........
sepanjang sem ni,,hidup aq ckup2 terseksa.....begitu bnyk kepahitan yang aq rase dari kemanisan...
mungkin,,ini dah jalan idup ku,,,aq terima Ya Rabb..aq redha...
Jiwa ku sering kecewa dengan hati2 manusia lain....setiap ape yang aq wat,,,xpenah terjadi dengan baik....
tp,,tidak mengape...jiwa aq kuat.....

tp,,hnya yang aq mohon,,tlg jage kedua org tuaku..hindarkanlah perkara yang xsepatutnya bg mereka....
jiwa aq cukup terseksa Ya Rahmn.......
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